My Biggest Belief Poem

My biggest belief is god!
I also believe that the Gospels of the Lord are correct in their words.
My biggest disbelief is abortion.
One who gets an abortions,
Also wants to kill life in general.
I am a strong believer that "Love in first sight" is not true love.
True love can only be once.
IF love is "true" love, than its not love at first sight.
Along with abortion, I do not believe in pre-marital sex.
I do believe that it is not right that troops are overseas.

being the world is nothing but violence, crime, and drugs
there are rules that had to be set.
One rule is "NO SHOPLIFTING"
another is "NO SMOKING"

There are a few "semi-beliefs"
Such as the sayings
"walking behind a ladder will cause luck"
"opening an umbrella inside will cause bad luck"

None of this is a lie,
And its all on me.
My words, My work

These are my beliefs and my work.

Why do I feel. . .?

Why do I feel the way I feel?
When you kiss me, I fell like I can not do anything.
When you hug me, I feel like I am secure.
When you hold my hand, I feel like I am loved.

Why do I feel like you are there for me?
When you hold me close, I feel like I can not let go.
When you say you love me, I feel like there's something there.
When you keep me in your heart, I feel like I know you're there.

Why do I feel like you care?
When you sense anger, I feel that you are the first to ask.
When you notice something wrong, I feel that you don't let go.
When you know why I shy off, I feel that you still try and kiss me.

Why do I feel so strong about your love?
When you hold me tight, I feel like holding on tighter.
When you kiss me, I feel like you really care.
When you say you love me, I feel like its more than words.

Why do I feel like there is something missing when I'm not with you?
When you sense something wrong, I feel like you are first in my arms.
When you acknowledge my appearance, I feel like you are the only one.
When you are away from me, I feel like I can not breathe.

Why do I feel this way?
All its done to me is hurt me inside, unless you are with me.
All its done to me is made me feel bad, unless I am with you.
All its done to me is got me up all night, unless we are together.

You told me you loved me
And that you'd never leave
But you broke my heart
Without even knowing it
You turned my life upside down
I told you I believed you
I said it was for the best
I know I said I understood
But it was all a big mess
And neither you nor I
Could ever replace
The time we spent apart
Not talking
Not listening
Not knowing each other
But just being apart
That time is gone
It can't be replaced
But the feelings we got rid of
Can always come back
They don't have to stay away
All we have to do
Is welcome them home
Acknowledge them
And they will boil up
And things can be
Almost like they were
But we'd still be missing that time
That we'd spent apart
Not talking
Not listening
Not knowing each other
But just being apart
I want you to come back
To be with me
I want me to go back
To be with you
I know that it could
YOU know that it could
It's all in if we let it
If we let it come back
If we let ourselves go back
To the way things used to be
Back when we were younger
And spent our time together
Talking
Listening
Knowing each other
Just being together

No one understands me,
No one understands how I feel,
Or why I feel that way.
I ask myself why I don’t understand,
And why others don’t understand,
Yet I can’t find the answer.

I know that no one cares about me,
Or about the way I feel.
If they did care,
I would be surprised.
I wouldn't know what to do,
I would have no control

I don't know anything anymore.
There are times I feel like hurting myself,
Just so I feel better.
Each and every time I’m stopped,
But only because there's one person that I know cares.
If I didn't know anybody that cared,
I would hurt myself everyday.

I wish more would understand me.
How I’m feeling,
What I’m like,
Why I like it,
And why I feel the way I do.
But no one will ever understand,
No matter what I do,
Or what anyone else does.

I want to give up more than anything.
I don’t know what to do.
I think I have found someone that understands me,
But I’m always wrong.
I never will try to seek for the right person again.

If I was sure that there are more people,
I would be happy.
It seems as if no one cares,
And so I don’t care.
It seems as if I don’t care,
So no one else does.
All I want is for people to understand me,
Understand how I feel,
And understand why I feel that way!

(Written Jan 23, 2005)

I'm afraid of loosing someone
I don't know what to do.
I've never felt like I do now ever
No one understands.

If only people understood,
Life would be at much ease
You may not understand,
But you don't stand in my shoes.

You don't now, nor will you ever
Walk in my shoes.
You don't now, nor will you ever
Feel the way I feel right now.

I've held on for so long,
But I think it's time to let go.
If I keep a hold,
I'll only get hurt.

He want's someone else.
What can I do?
I won't get jealous,
I'm just afraid of loosing someone.

If I didn't love/care about him,
I wouldn't care.
I wouldn't cry myself to sleep repeatedly
Just thinking about "him"

All I need is someone who cares.
Someone who loves me for me.
Someone that I can talk to.
Someone to have my back when needed.